If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize