I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
His nipple licking is glorious
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