idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
