it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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