Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
