Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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