we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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