I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
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