I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
