do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize