Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
