Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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