Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
