How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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