Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
