My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
