All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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