im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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