He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
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It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize