I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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