Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Is her dick bigger than yours?
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
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