I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.