Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park. http://tfl.nu/bxwf
  Replies (13) Good night (2779) Bad night (719)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine. http://tfl.nu/cm6i
  Replies (49) Good night (700) Bad night (6194)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge. http://tfl.nu/gb8a
  Replies (29) Good night (4309) Bad night (945)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (254): In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea. http://tfl.nu/fy1k
  Replies (8) Good night (2880) Bad night (1163)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (778): Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night. http://tfl.nu/vt5l
  Replies (8) Good night (3791) Bad night (1580)
• Favorite

  (213): View more from California

  "thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (213): "thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups. http://tfl.nu/qpz7
  Replies (17) Good night (3115) Bad night (1200)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (469): Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again. http://tfl.nu/qvag
  Replies (6) Good night (2186) Bad night (715)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (337): Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one. http://tfl.nu/xgt0
  Replies (1) Good night (1042) Bad night (491)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (856): When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'. http://tfl.nu/va9k
  Replies (8) Good night (1462) Bad night (969)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once. http://tfl.nu/s0yn
  Replies (5) Good night (1313) Bad night (548)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed' http://tfl.nu/zbjr
  Replies (2) Good night (1429) Bad night (346)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  What is this nonsense on the table

  (1-330): View more from Ohio

  Your idea.

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): What is this nonsense on the table (1-330): Your idea. (330): I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out http://tfl.nu/afwc
  Replies (5) Good night (299) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible http://tfl.nu/ks54
  Replies (3) Good night (361) Bad night (196)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown http://tfl.nu/kwyi
  Replies (2) Good night (458) Bad night (219)
• Favorite

  (564): View more from Washington

  I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (564): I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened. http://tfl.nu/a3m1
  Replies (2) Good night (587) Bad night (206)

Randomize