On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize