i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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