East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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