I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Randomize
