I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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