cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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