dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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