separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
