let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
