there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Just took my morning after pill in the library
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
