You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
