I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
