.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
