Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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