she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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