Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
How external is "for external use only"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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