I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
This is my gift to your gina
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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