I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
I need to stop coming to work sober
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Randomize
