Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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