drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize