Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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