Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
