just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
