DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
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