what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
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I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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