I just threw up on my dentist
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast