in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Randomize
