my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
