I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I have post one night stand depression
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